A jump off the Golden Gate Bridge takes around four seconds, during which a person will reach a speed of 80 mph before smashing into the water's surface like concrete. If you enjoyed this article, subscribe now to receive more just like it. Someone may have seen something -- any piece of information could help lead us to Sydney," parents Kimberly and Jay West said in a joint statement. But 10 years later, Im there again. Also Live Through This website has beautiful portraits (photographic but also in prose) of people who survived a suicide attempt. West returned to the Bay Area for college at UC Berkeley after her family moved from Pleasanton to North Carolina several years ago. "Jump." That's the word Kevin Hines heard in his head on September 25, 2000, as he stood on the Golden Gate Bridge. Also, I've authored the books Helping the Suicidal Person: Tips and Techniques for Professionals and Loving Someone with Suicidal Thoughts: What Family, Friends, and Partners Can Say and Do. Suicide prevention can save lives. I just need time to tidy up affairs, belongings, finances, assemble the plan. I hope he is seeing a psychiatrist for his medications, not a PCP, because psychiatrists are much more well versed in the benefits, risks, side effects, etc. Therapists and doctors may help provide relief. I pray tonight. At the time of her disappearance Sydney was 5 feet 10 inches tall, weighs around 130 pounds with light brown hair and blue eyes. Sign promoting a 24/7 crisis text line on the Golden Gate Bridge. But it was my final stay at a state mental hospital when I began reading a book that finally spoke to me: Dying for a Drink, and for the first time in my life I recognized the fact that I was an alcoholic and that I had been treating major depression with a depressant. Getting through them is the way to make your life your own again.. She was last seen around 6:45 am when she was dropped off by a rideshare driver. I used to believe my problems are so intractable that the only way out of my pain was suicide. My advice to you or to those considering suicide or attempted suicide, please THINK of your loved one, your family and friends. 2023 CBS Broadcasting Inc. All Rights Reserved. Simply put unless you die the battle won or pain doesnt matter. As a teenager, I related so closely and had so many mixed emotions in comparing the results of my vs the characters attempts. "No detail is too small," said her mother, Kimberly West. At this point I feel like Ill just maim myself or end up locked up for a minimum of six months( yes thats happened to me). I know that this surprises many people. After graduating high school in 2019, she decided to take a gap year in Australia. There are far more narcissistic dads and men than there are women and mothers. Andrew has written for The Atlantic, Vice, SF Weekly, the San Francisco Chronicle, McSweeney's, The Bold Italic, Drowned in Sound and many other places. She was last seen in the area around 6:45 a.m. She was, for a period of time, carrying a black backpack that she frequently used to get around town. Cameras on the Golden Gate Bridge recorded Sydney the morning of Sept. 30. Note: I wanted to make this post to hopefully create some sort of discussion around the case since it was almost a year and a half ago. It may feel 100% true to him. Say someone wants to die by suicideso badly that they go to the Golden Gate Bridge to jump off. While at Berkeley she joined the rowing team and showed a strong interest in medicine, business, and biological science. Berkeley when she went missing on September 30, 2020. Search within r/redsox. His father had died by suicide and even though I knew all of this, I couldnt see the forest through the trees. Dialectical behavior therapy? Dayna. We remain hopeful that someone knows something that will be helpful in finding her.. Generally, research into method substitution has found that blocking access to a suicide method results in fewer suicides overall, even when taking into consideration those suicides by people who found other ways to die. I am not sure anybody really wants to die but I know many people, including myself, who are just sick and tired of living and want it to be over. A little over four years ago I couldnt see an end to the emotional pain and despair I felt and became obsessed with thoughts of killing myself: another failed marriage, another lost job, another lost home, my girlfriend left me and just as we seemed to be getting back together died of a stroke. I often think that if we are going to make up what we tell ourselves about our future, we might at least make it good. She was at Crissy Field, near the bridge. In February 2009, following the murder of a four-year-old girl who was thrown off the bridge by her father, the first stage of a temporary suicide barrier was erected on Westgate Bridge, constructed of concrete crash barriers topped with a welded mesh fence. So there are many, many more medications and medication combinations that he can try. "I just want to reach out to all the folks that have been supporting us over the past almost month now, communicate that the support and the love that we get is just absolutely amazing," Wests dad, Jay West, said in the clip. That is so sad, Julie. Everything says Get help. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Wests parents led a socially-distanced vigil in Pleasanton last Thursday. How Parents Can Support a Child With Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Survivor Stories Empowered Me to Live, How Ive Survived and Thrived with Suicidal Thoughts, A Personal Note to Readers of Speaking of Suicide, Helping the Suicidal Person: Tips and Techniques for Professionals, psychotherapist and consultant in private practice. Had she jumped somebody definitely would have noticed, and it would've been caught on CCTV (the cameras are placed on light poles so fog does not block). Have you read Whats In the Way Is the Way by Mary OMalley? The bridge is 225 feet high, and after a four-second fall, jumpers hit the water at a speed of 75mph, with a force equivalent to a lorry crashing into a wall. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Required fields are marked *. It gives me a good opportunity to dispel concerns that others may have, too. Your email address will not be published. A. His passing causes lots of pain, sadness and changed others lives entirely. How could I have been so stupid? Background: Sydney West was born on July 11, 2001. Sydney Kaitlyn West, 19, was last seen near the Golden Gate Bridge around 6:45 a.m. on September 30, 2020. Some die instantly from internal injuries, while others . I hope you believe your words here, or at least are beginning to. I have battled the thoughts of suicide for many years but after I had children those thoughts died. I understand completely. of the different medications. What happens to them afterward? News. He might also have refused to remove the gun from the home, too. As the deaths of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain draw attention to the public health crisis of depression and mental illness, Megyn Kelly TODAY welcomes Kevi. "On Aug. 20, 1985, I jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge, and I survived." Ken Baldwin was 28 years old and had just started a family. In 2013, Briggs retired from the California Highway . Anyone in the Bay Area with any information regarding her disappearancecan contact Sgt. "This will be the biggest jump of my life," he told her. Precious few people survive such a fall; the water about 200 feet below acts the same as concrete when a person lands on it at high speed. I am sure your mum will be watching over you, so sad that she caused you so much pain, please seek help, you are precious, with love xxx. I think this message needs to be made more clear and put in ads, etc. But what about people like me? Precious few people survive such a fall; the water about 200 feet below acts the same as concrete when a person lands on it at high speed. They have a good, nonjudgmental, and supportive discussions at ChronicSuicideSupport.com/forum/. Your pain matters. After the war, people were looking for entertainment in 1940's San Francisco, but TVs were not yet common in homes, public hangings were history and the 49ers hadnt joined the NFL yet. Hundreds more are stopped from harming themselves through the efforts of the Golden Gate Bridge District . The most intuitive reason is that suicidal crises are, by their nature, temporary. All 29 people who survived their suicide attempts off San Francisco's Golden Gate Bridge have said they regretted their decision as soon as they jumped. Previously, police said she had not been seen or heard from since before dawn, on Sept. 29. r/redsox. She was also seen wearing black shorts at times and may have been wearing glasses, said her father, Jay West. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed. I hope you can find peace within. It was apparently very foggy that morning. People are stupid. She was struggling with depression for years. I am now 49, and I fantasize about suicide knowing I will never actually do it but wishing it was an option. Sometimes, life just sucks and the pain of living is unbearable. Any suggestions? Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Growing up Sydney was described as a sweet and goofy girl who wasnt afraid of being herself. My sons father committed suicide and in the moments he was alive after shooting himself he kept saying sorry I shouldnt have never done this over and over. Her family is not giving up hope that she is still alive and remains determined to find her. Copyright 2013 Stacey Freedenthal, PhD, LCSW, All Rights Reserved. There are many people with children whose pain or distorted thinking overrides all else, in spite of their best wishes. Your comments are false. I find myself returning to that time in my life and wondering if this is the way Im supposed to go, or if the survival instinct will continue to win. How many of the survivors were so injured by the attempt that they were unable to complete the act? Clad in two suits, weighted boots, football padding, another rubber suit and a football helmet that onlookers described as giving him a man-from-Mars look, Rhodes also had three parachutes on his back to ease his fall. Overall, a meta-analysis of numerous studies that looked at bridges suicide barriers found them to be effective. Its impossible to know but something to consider, in case youre only considering the set of possibilities for which you blame yourself. I mean how long can I go ahead. They planned to reconvene in L.A. the following day to hatch a plan to monetize the footage. The 265-foot plunge off the most famous bridge in the world was right in his wheelhouse, until it wasnt. Interviews with jump survivors and potential jumpers . Hello Tony, so sorry for my belated response. Now I dont know if I can fight it, but coping with failure and constant depression is impossible. You might be helped by connecting with other people who have attempted suicide and can understand not only what can lead a person to do that, but also what comes after. In the midst of a struggle with mental illness, Hines got a running start . The details of your life will, of course, be different but we have our humanness in common. Privacy Policy. Her Disappearance: Sydney West was a 19-year-old freshman at U.C. Its a really simple concept. I worry almost everyday that Ill maim myself again and not die. West's parents are asking anyone who may have been commuting or exercising on the bridge to come forward with anything they may have seen. I just read your post. I was able to make it out of the hopelessness and despair that led to my attempt. I am hopeful that similar results will be found after the suicide barrier at the Golden Gate bridge is in place. Thank you for sharing, Stacy. But I have. Its unfair. Theres people who love you and want you to keep pushing even if your soul reason is living to not put them through that heartache. Learn how your comment data is processed. Where Are They Now? SFGATE's Editor-at-Large Andrew Chamings is a British writer in San Francisco. All clues so far, the family has revealed, have not been fruitful. Also, on the Resources page, I list a number of websites and other resources for people who have lost someone to suicide. While living in San Francisco West enjoyed singing and playing the piano for open mic nights around the city. Anyone who has seen her since is also asked to contact San Francisco police at 415-575-4444 or the family's private investigator at 925-705-8328. Parenthood does not protect everyone, though. He has no one else but me. Ive worked in Mental health, Ive lost a family member through suicide. None of us can. It was in 1984. I address the myth of inevitable suicide in this post. Reach out to someone, anyone because I can tell you they have no idea how you feel. In Toronto, the barrier at the Bloor Viaduct did not reduce the number of people who died of suicide by jumping in the city; it just moved them to other locations. PART OF AUDACY NEWS. Youve been through an enormous amount. The Pittsburg Sun-Telegraph on May 2, 1948. Photos purchased from Fotolia.com. I wear various hats: I created and maintain this website, Speaking of Suicide, I'm an associate professor at the University of Denver Graduate School of Social Work, and I have a psychotherapy and consulting practice. He now works daily, and diligently, to manage continued symptoms that can include depression and hearing voices. Car plunges off California elevated highway, 3 people killed. There are some reports that Sydney may have suffered from depression. We certainly do need to continue educating people about suicide prevention, including the reality that most people who survive a suicide attempt choose life afterwards. To request removal of your name from an arrest report, submit these required items to arrestreports@patch.com. She is described as standing 5'10", weighing about 130 pounds, with light brown hair and blue eyes and possibly wearing glasses. But then they are stopped from jumping. An estimated 1,600 people have committed suicide by jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge, which has warnings but no barrier. If your child will play baseball or softball this spring, youll need to stock up on appropriate clothing and equipment. Sydney Harbour Bridge, the Golden Gate lacks a suicide barrier . For example, upon hearing me take total responsibility for the failure of my first marriage a gifted woman who is a counselor and pastor said, I typically find that both parties share responsibility equally. Im sorry to hear of your loss Each. I just hope that one day her family will get answers. Her father grew worried when she didnt call the next day the day she was last spotted in San Francisco. And I got very drunk every time I drank after that, which was quite often. She replied, She probably figured she could fix you. This was the beginning of my recognition of the fact that I wasnt the horrible person I made myself out to be, in fact, my story is very much like a lot of alcoholics Ive met. They lied about every imaginable factor of surviving in life. Except that my fiance was making me depressed because he wouldnt move in with me again like how we were living together before. First published on January 25, 2021 / 11:03 AM. Enter your email address to receive notifications by email of new posts. I know there will be a lot of people out there who will think a certain thing happened to Sydney. Hines, who suffers from bipolar disorder, survived a jump from San Francisco's Golden Gate Bridge in 2000. West's parents are asking anyone who may have been. I was determined and had written a detailed letter with instructions for the police and family. After he was rescued, he continued to live, and lives still, serving as a suicide prevention advocate at the national level. It may help,, Kind Regards, A view of the Golden Gate Bridge with San Francisco behind it in January 1947. Your Privacy Choices (Opt Out of Sale/Targeted Ads). One desperate and hurt person to another. My passion for helping suicidal people stems from my own lived experience with suicidality and suicide loss. Sadly, your post is being used by some commenters to justify the Golden Gate Bridge net boondoggle. Rhodes press agent, Susan Todd, told reporters that Dusty had painstakingly calculated the speed of his fall, how he would hit the water and other details, as he did when he prepared for his movie stunts. Sydney West was last seen near the Golden Gate Bridge in the early morning hours of Sept. 30, walking near Crissy Field. I want you to know you are loveable and precious. I knew then that I would never try it again. The Golden Gate Bridge is the number one suicide site in the world. It is believed that she had moved out of the dorms into an apartment with some friends near campus. Yes I know this fear of failure as well. Its not always a change of mind when deciding not to jump its fear of failure, Hi Londa, She was said to be very close with her family. Obviously, I failed. Its agonizing to lose someone you love to suicide, and you describe that agony very powerfully. Found it was in part due to hormone imbalance along with sugar imbalances, throw in that its winter along with little sleep, emotional bombs going off and I had the perfect storm. "We have a lot of people that are asking us for information.". He once tried to jump off the Aloha Tower in Honolulu only to be thwarted at the last minute by police. Even so, bridge foreman Arthur Olson caught up with the stuntman as the crowd gathered, and grabbed him, but lost his grip, only succeeding in ripping free one of the harnesses. What do you tell the ones who still perceive they have no one how do I get through to him? Upon its completion in 1937, it was the tallest and longest suspension bridge in the world. The West family has also upped its reward for her return to $25,000. It amazes me that the vast majority of suicides are by men, and virtually all of the articles about it are by women. Sydney Kaitlyn West, 19, was last seen near the Golden Gate Bridge around 6:45 a.m. on September 30, 2020. Others need to respect the decision. The Golden Gate Bridge came to be recognized as a symbol of the power and progress of the United States, and it set a precedent for suspension-bridge design around the world. Video footage from the bridge has been carefully reviewed by investigators but due to foggy and smoky conditions camera views where obstructed making it impossible to tell her exact location on the bridge. Comments RSS Feed, My name is Denis and I live in England I am still recovering at the moment on 22nd of April 2020 I attempted to end my life I jumped off a 5 story carpark and survived I broke my left leg in 3 places and my right ankle in 6 places and my back in 2 places but I am lucky because I am recovering well and I can walk .people say its a mircle but I feel gulty because no one knew about the thoughts I was having for years because I did not tell any one to the outside world I was the life and soul of the party .I feel ashamed that now every one is worried about me and that is not what I wanted. The Golden Gate Bridge crosses the Golden Gate Strait and connects the City of San Francisco and the County of Marin to the north. If you want to talk with someone immediately by phone, text, or chat, please check out the Resources page. It is true that suicide sometimes defies even the best efforts to thwart it. Be blunt and honest dont sugar coat how you feel. Public File for KBCW-TV / KBCW 44 Cable 12. But the cameras lost sight of her because of heavy fog, making it impossible to know what happened toher. This is perhaps the best argument for preventing suicide. There were probably signs that you had a drinking problem from the very beginning. It was a startling revelation. West is 5'10" and slender at 130 pounds, with blue eyes and light brown hair. West had just gone off to college to her dream school, University of California Berkeley. Rhodes, who also went by his native Navajo name Chief Sundown, was no stranger to danger. My name is Steven. I once attributed that simply to having realized I wanted to live and (narrowly) surving my attempt. We talked a lot about loving each other. There are so many types of antidepressants these days (around 40), plus mood stabilizers, plus antipsychotic medications that can also be used to treat depression. Dont believe anyone who tells you differently. (findsydneywest.com) West was last seen on the morning of Sept. 30 on the iconic bridge. Once her gap year was over, she moved back to California decided to attend U.C. Theyre asking anyone "who may have been walking, biking, running, who commute over the bridge particularly Wednesday mornings at that time" to share information if they might have seen West or anything that can help locate the missing teen. My hope for others feeling like that is they tell someone who can help them. That's a mind-blowing statement. Anyone with information is asked to contact private investigator Scott Dudek at (925) 705-8328 or Dudek.associates@gmail.com. At this point, the instinct is what keeps me living. Anyone interested in following the investigation may do so on Facebook or Instagram, and tag posts with #FindSydneyWest. I know how hard it is. Your message here is a good one. Too, people who attempt suicide may receive the help they need afterwards. The ongoing survival of people who attempt suicide is not (always) inevitable. 18 I held a gun to my head in my backyard w my finger on the trigger. Sydneyhas light brown hair and blue eyes. SFGATE news editor Amy Graff contributed to this report. Such an assumption would be wrong. She struggled with being so far away from her parents and sister, who reside in North Carolina. Each year I did - 2004, 2007, and 2013 - the Red Sox went on to win the World Series. She is from Chapel Hill, N.C. I am a three time attempt suicide survivor and it has been a year since my last attempt and the ideation has pretty much left me. Lets get real here life sucks and its hard but dont give up. If I make it, Ill have publicity and be on my way, Rhodes told a friend who later testified at the coroners inquest. Im afraid to try again and it just adds for anger, desperation, loss of control over my own life and guilt for those in my life who have to worry. The chances of surviving. I had my suicidal thoughts since I was a child I lost my mum when I was 9 years old she took her own life and even now after my attempt I still dont know how to feel about what happened to her and what I have done to my self but I know I will have to find a way to live with the impact of my attempt and hopefully find a way to some sort of happiness, Please seek help, therapy to work through your trauma, it must be so hard to have lost your mum in this way and your nine year old self could only feel abandoned, not enough to have stopped her. I hear you. Its death toll has since been surpassed only by the Nanjing Yangtze River Bridge in China.. I tried commiting suicide and ended up brain dead Then after I got out of the coma, I was put in rehab for 11 months where I kept trying to break my neck and die because I missed my fiance so much (he wasnt allowed to visit me because he had attempted suicide with me too since he didnt want to live without me). And for most of those whose lives were saved, life goes on for many more years to come. But what if you dont want help? suicide sometimes defies even the best efforts to thwart it, University of Denver Graduate School of Social Work, http://www.SpeakingOfSuicide.com/resources/#immediatehelp, If Only: Self-Blame After a Loved Ones Suicide, You Cant Do Everything: Limitations in Helping a Suicidal Person, a meta-analysis of numerous studies that looked at bridges suicide barriers, Generally, research into method substitution, 10 Things Not to Say to a Suicidal Person. Wishing you peace, I am both, not realizing this until reading today My dad ended his life by his own hands , when I was 9. My brother did the same in 2002. ive suffered depression for Years, 2 suicide attempts in 2008. In fact, Dusty told his friend to shoot from the bridge as it would be more dramatic, and besides, he would easily be able to swim to shore to a congratulatory, awestruck crowd of beach goers. At 10 o'clock in the morning, Ken. Dressed in a blue sweatshirt, leggings and Vans slip-on sneakers,. West was born in Walnut Creek and lived briefly in Castro Valley before her family moved to Pleasanton. There is not much known about the day Sydney disappeared. Shortly after 1 p.m. on March 8, San Francisco officials pulled the fully clothed body of a 56-year-old white man from the waves off secluded Marshall's Beach, just south of the Golden Gate Bridge.